The Struggle to Love
by Chrissytina
Summary: Set after The Long Con. Kate and Sawyer struggle with their feelings for each other. SKATE!
1. Chapter 1 Tears and Hurt

**Hi! Hope you enjoy this fic! Well this is my first EVER fic! From my English exams I get bad marks so please be easy on me if its rubbish! Apparently I need to 'expand my vocabulary'.**

**Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own lost. **

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**Chapter One **

It was a couple of days ago that Sawyer took the guns from the hatch, the same day that Kate last talked to him, telling why she thought he took the guns. The camp was finally settling down over the situation and went back to their usual day-to-day routines.

Everyone was avoiding Sawyer until the fifth day, someone was over shadowing him. Making it impossible for him to read his book. He waited for a while to make a sarcastic remark but decided against it, and just asked the obvious question.

"What do you want?!" he tried to keep his voice as calm as possible.

"I want to borrow something."

Sawyer brought up his head he was wearing some glasses he found, as he lost his other one on the raft. He smiled at the figure, showing of his dimples.

"Well what can I do for ya, _Freckles_?" his voice lightening up a little, seeing as it was only Kate.

"Well I was wondering if you had any spare tarp, as you seem to have everything now."

"Why?"

"Since when do I have to tell you everything?"

"Well you didn't get Carte Blanche, so I get to ask why?" he knew all the asking was annoying Kate but he was liking it as this was better than reading his book.

"If you really want to know, I'm making my tent better" her voice growing more annoyed.

"Well let's save the tarp and you can sleep here with me." his smile growing wider.

"Can you just not be such a pig for one minute?" At that moment Kate turned her back on Sawyer and walked off.

Sawyer resumed on reading his book but he couldn't concentrate. The conversation earlier with Kate kept coming back to his mind. Rummaging around his tent he found a spare piece of tarp and decided to find Kate and give it to her. Pulling back the plastic sheets, he braced himself for the sudden brightness. Scanning around the beach he saw Kate sitting at the far end of the beach, the sea water lapping up her feet. He started walking slowly up to her.

Kate always sat away from the camp when she wanted to be alone and just relax. Since being on the island a lot has happened to her, she's been chased by polar bears, held captive by the Other's and she even started to have feelings for Sawyer. But she tried to push that out of her mind. She felt someone walking towards her, then something landed on the sand next to her. Kate turned her head to look what landed on the sand, a rolled up plastic tarp. She started to smile and looked up at the figure.

"So, I'm I dreaming or is Sawyer, the guy who doesn't give and only take, is giving _me _something I asked for a couple of hours ago?" she sat there thinking why he finally gave the tarp to her.

"Fine, if you don't want-"he started to reach for the tarp but Kate stopped him, her hand on his arm.

"No, I'll take it."

They made eye contact, staring at each others eyes, in a deep trance, their faces only inches away from each other. Sawyer started to lean towards Kate. Until Kate snapped out of it and pulled back away from Sawyer. She realised she still had her hand on Sawyer's arm and pulled it away like it was hot on fire.

"Erm...I better get started on my tent...I'll see you around, and thank you…you know for the-" she gestured to the tarp and stood up.

"No problem, glad to have helped ya sweetheart." he looked away trying to disguise he was annoyed, but Kate knew he was.

"Ok, bye." Kate walked off. Leaving Sawyer.

Sawyer sat their thinking about what just happened when Kate touched his arm; it was like it created a electric spark once her hand touched his skin. When he started to lean towards her why did she pull back? Was she afraid something was going to happen? Did he want something to happen? Sawyer shook his head to forget about that thought. He knew it would never happen; it was like the typical story, the con man and the fugitive. He sat there in the same spot where Kate left him repeating the words 'it would never happen', because he didn't want it, did he?

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

_What did just happen with Sawyer? Am I starting to feel something for him? Even love him? No, I don't love him, I barely know the guy. He cons women all the time, he always messes around with their feelings, he knows how to pull the right strings and he's trying to mess with mine._

Jack started to approach Kate, who seemed to be daydreaming and walking to nowhere in particular.

"Hey Kate." Kate didn't turn around, she just kept on walking.

"Kate!" he shouted.

"Hm, what?" she snapped out of her day dreaming "Oh, hi Jack."

"You didn't answer me when I first shouted your name, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine Jack" Jack gave her a are-you-sure Jack look "Seriously, Jack, I'm fine"

"Okay, well I wanted to ask if you wanted to be on the night shift at the hatch tonight."

"Who else is on it?" she asked, really not paying any attention.

"Sawyer" Kate looked up at Jack "I know he's the last thing you want to be with, but-"

"I'll do it" she replied

"Are you sure?"

"You came to me to me if I wanted to do the night shift and now you asking me if I'm sure?!" Kate was starting to get annoyed.

"Hey, I was just asking, I was just making sure, what's wrong with you today?"

"Nothing, I'll do the night shift." Jack started to come closer to Kate "It's nothing"

"Kate."

"I don't have to tell you everything!" Kate snapped. Jack backed away shocked at Kate's response, but most of all hurt by Kate's words.

"I see you don't need my company" Jack whispered and walked away from Kate, still hurting inside.

"Ja-"she tried to call for him but it wouldn't come out.

She didn't know what to do. But then she did what she was best at. What she always did when she want to get away from everything. She ran. Deep into the jungle, away from anyone. From everything. She ran as fast as her legs could carry and stopped at a tall tree. Looking around to make sure no one was around she climbed up the tree and perched on a branch strong enough to hold her weight. Kate just sat there with her legs dangling freely. A tear dropped from her eyes and she let another one fall, after a few minutes she was sitting there, alone, crying. Why she was crying, she didn't know. Maybe it was because of her past, Wayne, her mom, Tom, Kevin, Jack and maybe even Sawyer. It was because of her past she always pushed away those who cared for her, Tom, Kevin, Jack, and Sawyer. It was like she had a barrier that comes up every time anyone came close to her, and see how she really is, the real Kate. The thought of it terrifies her so much, if someone actually got to look at the real Kate, they would see a vulnerable person. And she didn't want that to happen.

**So how was it? Please review! Or any suggestions for any future chapters.**


	2. Chapter 2 Truths and Alcohol

Ok here is the second chapter! Have fun reading. The sentences in italics are what the characters are thinking if you didn't realise, but i think you would anyway! Thank you for **SassyLostie** and** Trapped in a MatchBox** for my fiirst reviews!

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**Chapter Two**

It was later in the day and Sawyer's shift in the hatch was not until another couple of hours, so he decided to pick some fruit as his stash was running low. Seeing as most of the fruit near the beach has been picked it meant he would have to go deeper into the jungle to get fresh fruit.

Since the little encounter with the Others he has been more aware, when in the jungle. He could hear every breath he took as he moved deeper into the jungle

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Kate managed to stop crying, and started to climb back down the tree but she slipped halfway down the tree. She quickly held her grasp onto the tree to prevent her from falling. When she landed on the jungle floor she was ready to walk back to the beach when the trees in front of her started to move, her mind told her to grab the rock and throw it at that 'thing' and she did, throwing it as hard as she could.

"Ow, Jesus freckles, this better be you, coz if it ain't-"

"Sawyer" she sighed as Sawyer emerged from the tree

"Why do ya have ta throw a rock at every damn thing that moves, and hittin' my damn knee _again_, that ain't a way ta treat a gentlemen."

Kate grinned "Well good thing you're not a gentlemen"

"Ooo that was bit harsh wasn't it, Cavegirl?"

"Well I'm going back to camp. What are you doing here so far into the jungle?"

"What are _you_ doing so far in the jungle?" he grinned as Kate rolled her eyes.

"I asked first."

"I.. I was out here pickin' fruit." he was struggling to say the words as he knew Kate was going to tease him about it.

"The big bad Sawyer is going all soft now? First the tarp and _now_ picking fruit?" she laughed

"Well why don't you go _back_ to the beach and have a long laugh about it?" he glared at Kate.

"I didn't mean-"

"Save it Freckles." he turned around and started to walk off slowly deeper into the jungle.

"Sawyer! Come on, I ..." she tried to catch up with Sawyer, and stopped him by touching his shoulder "I didn't mean to upset you." Sawyer turned around staring at the green eyes staring back at him.

"Go back" he shrugged Kate's hand off his shoulder and walked away from her.

"Why do you have to always be like this?!" she shouted at him.

"Be like what?!" he shouted back, he turned around facing her, his voice scared her, she never seen him like this.

"Why do you always close up whenever someone tries to be close you?" she held her breath to waiting for his response.

"Why do _you always_ close up whenever I get _close_ to_ you_?!" he stood there staring at her, she didn't reply, all she did was stare right back at his big blue eyes. "Well you have your reason and I have mine. Don't even follow me" he quickly added and walked away. Leaving Kate alone. Her vision was starting to get blurry. _No I'm not going to cry. _She quickly rubbed her eyes walking the opposite way from Sawyer.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Sawyer managed to get a couple of mangoes before heading back to the hatch for his night shift. He got a little lost but found it in the end. _Wonder who's on the night shift_. He walked along the corridor. The hatch still gave him the creeps.

Kate sat on the couch in the hatch and was engrossed into a book she was reading. Until someone's voice echoed in the hatch.

"Honey, I'm home" she jumped, she knew who it was, Sawyer was here and she is going to spent the whole night with him. _Great!_ _I wonder how many hours, no minutes until we argue about something stupid and pointless._

She saw Sawyer appear from the tunnel, she was waiting for a sarcastic remark from him, maybe even a new nickname, but nothing came out of his mouth. Then it hit her, she totally forgot about the conversation they had earlier that day. She decided to make the first move, and maybe she could tell what mood he is in.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself." he mumbled not looking at Kate.

_Oh great! This is going to be just great! He is still mad at me!_ she thought

"I was about to make some coffee, you want one?" she asked

"Nah, I'm not the coffee type, I'm just gonna shower now." He looked up at Kate for the first time since his arrival, his mood starting to lighten. Kate nodded at him and went to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee. _Maybe this won't be bad after all._

Sawyer grabbed a bottle of shampoo from the store room and headed to the bathroom. _So, I'm gonna spend my night shift with freckles now this gotta be interesting._

xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Kate made her cup of coffee and went over to the record player to put a record on. She sat back down on the couch sipping her cup of coffee slowly, savouring it. It had been a long time since she had a cup of coffee. Suddenly the bathroom down slid open and Sawyer walked out with just his jeans on, his hair and body still wet. Kate nearly let out a gasp; she never realised until now how attractive Sawyer is, and mentally kicked herself for even thinking about it.

"Got any better music?" he asked.

"Well most of the music here is about 20 years old so, no." trying not to look at Sawyer.

"Ok." He moved and sat next to Kate "What shall we do then?"

"Well _we_ got to push that button" She gestured to the computer "Every 108, that's what we're here for isn't it?" she looked at him.

"Well apart from that, Sassafras, got any alcohol here?"

"I think there's some in the store room" Sawyer stood up.

"Well I think now things gone a bit more interestin'." he grinned at Kate, and she rolled her eyes. He walked to the storeroom rummaging around for any signs of alcohol.

"Ah-ha" he found a bottle and walked back into the living room, where he left Kate "Got myself some Dharma Beer, wanna share?" Kate reached up to grab the big bottle but Sawyer pulled it out of her reach and sat next to her on the couch.

"Hey, you asked if-"

"Ah ah ah, well you gotta play-"

"I'm not going to play 'I Never' again."

"Nah, we gonna play 'Truth or Dare'." Kate gave him a look "What don't tell me you never-"

"Yeah, I played it, but we don't need any alcohol for it, and don't you think we're a bit… old for it?"

"Baby, we're never too _old_ for anythin'. And we can just drink the beer while playin'."

"So what are we waiting for?" she grabbed the bottle.

"Ok then Princess, truth or dare? No lemme guess its gonna be truth."

"Good guess Tex, never know what dare you would give me." Sawyer smirked.

"Darn it Freckles; I had a good one as well. Hmm lemme think." He sat there thinking.

"Before you turn 50 please!"

"Ok, ok, why do ya have ter be so impatient huh? Ok, if me 'n the doc were in a life 'n death situation and you only can choose _one_ ter live, who would you choose?" he looked at her, he knew it was a difficult question.

"I…I can't answer that. That's not fair, I…I care about you both…equally." she looked at him in the eyes.

"Ok then I let you off." He took a gulp out of the bottle. Kate sighed.

"Truth or dare?"

"Truth." She looked at Sawyer, shocked.

"Really?I thought you would have chose dare."

"Well, if you are so eager-"

"No. I've got one. How did you end up on the plane?"

_What do I tell her? I was in Australia to kill a man?_ He paused thinking what to say.

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Please review! Fav. Lines, suggestions etc 


	3. Chapter 3 Dares and Confusion

Hey! Thanks for the reviews! You know who you are! Well here is the next chapter... all i can say is that maybe there is a kiss somewhere in this chapter... ENJOY! I'm thinking of updating every **Tuesday** as this it the only day i'm not busy with homework, coursework, etc etc blah blah**

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Chapter Three - Dares and confusion**

Sawyer opened his mouth "You really want to know?"

"Yeah." Sawyer paused for a moment.

"I was out in Australia to kill a man who I thought was the real 'Sawyer', but he wasn't, I was tricked, he was innocent, he didn't even see it coming-"

"Sawyer, you didn't have to tell me-"

"You wanted the 'truth' didn't ya?" he growled.

"Maybe we shouldn't play this game."

"Not chickening out are ya?"

"No."

"Truth or dare."

"Dare." Sawyer grinned, she knew his mood was lightening, just because she chose Dare.

"Never thought I'd see the day. I dare ya to drink all that bottle of beer."

"That's it?" she looked at him confused.

"Yeah." she grabbed the bottle of Sawyer and drank it all, every, single, drop.

"Truth….or dare?" she tried to say it without slurring her words.

"Dare."

"I dare _you_." She pointed at him "to kiss me."

"Freckles, you're drunk…"

"Am not! What? You're not going to kiss me?" she looked at him with her green eyes.

"You're drunk." he looked back at those eyes.

"You're refusing a dare?" she started laughing but something stopped her. He kissed her gently on the lips, but she didn't pull away she just accepted it and kissed him back. Then she wrapped her arms around his neck and it became more passionate. He pulled her closer to him, never wanting to let her go. At that moment all they needed was each other.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Sawyer woke up, still on the couch with his arms wrapped around Kate. Nothing happened after they kissed; Kate fell asleep on him straight after it. He stared at her, she looked so peaceful. The computer alarm started to beep, trying not to wake her he slowly moved her off himself and placed her on the couch. He walked over to the computer and inputted the numbers, the timer started to flip back to 108. He went over to the kitchen and started to cut up his mangoes he picked earlier and started eating it sitting on a stool by the kitchen counter. He started to think about what happened earlier with him and Kate. Should he just forget about it, she was very drunk she would probably not remember.

Kate started to stir. Her eyes flicked open. It felt like someone was banging her head with a hammer. She started to moan.

"Somethin' wrong Freckles?" he started to walk towards her.

"Bad…headache." she moaned.

"Well that, sweetheart, is a hangover." he laughed.

"Well at least you can get me some aspirin."

"Sure honey." he said sarcastically.

Sawyer went to the storeroom to find some aspirin. He saw a bag of medical supplies at the top of the shelf and had to stand on a crate to reach the medical supplies. He walked into the kitchen and started to look through the bag, he found a bottle under some bandages. He filled a glass with water and walked to Kate and gave her the aspirin and water.

"Thanks." she whispered and took the aspirin and glass of water out of his hand and threw the aspirin in her mouth and took a gulp of water.

"This is your fault."

"Me?" he tried to appear shocked.

"Yeah, you." She looked up at him "I you didn't dare me to drink that bottle of beer, I wouldn't be having this hangover." She didn't want to mention what happened next, maybe he forgot about it. She was drunk she didn't know what she was doing, did she?

"What time is it?" she asked trying to take her mind of it.

"Just 'bout 4 in the mornin'."

"Hurley and Charlie will be coming at 6 to take over the shift."

"Joy!" he muttered.

"So...what shall we do?"

"Well no way I'm givin' you any alcohol." Kate rolled her eyes "How about I sleep in the bunk and you keep watch on that beeping box over there."

"Fine."

"You ok with me leavin' you here?"

"Sure, you go and rest."

Sawyer went to the bedroom and laid on the small bed. He tried to sleep but somehow he couldn't, he laid there with his arms around his head, thinking. _Kate must have forgotten, well she was drunk, how was she supposed to remember? Even if she did, she would say she was drunk and she didn't mean it, or did she? No, don't even think about it. I don't do attached, look what happened to Cassidy, they will always end up hurt._

He finally fell asleep until someone's voice woke him up, it was talking to Kate. He remained on the bed listening into their conversation.

"So you were ok spending the shift with him last night? He didn't give you any hassle did he?"

"No Jack, it was fine. Really" she quickly added as he gave another one of his are-you-sure Jack looks.

He changed the subject. "You said you have a headache."

"I drank too mush beer than I should have." He looked at her unconvinced

"Did he force you?"

"No, he didn't." Sawyer grinned that Kate was defending him.

"Ok, you want me to walk you back to the beach?"

"It's ok."

"Hurley and Charlie are on their way so-"

"It's ok , Jack." She assured him.

Sawyer walked into the kitchen, where Jack and Kate were standing.

"Well Howdy doc. What brings you 'ere?" he grinned at Jack.

"Erm, I was just passing by."

"What? You don't trust me with Freckles here? She's still in one piece if ya worried."

"With a headache." He muttered.

"What did ya say?"

"Nothing. I'd better be going." He nodded at Kate as he walked out of the hatch. Suddenly the hatch was silent.

"So its just you and me now Freckles."

She looked up at him "Charlie and Hurley will be coming any minute."

The hatch door slammed shut and they heard footsteps coming towards them, echoing through the corridor.

"Here they come now." He muttered.

"Hey." Said Charlie "Didn't know you two were going to be here."

"It was a last minute thing. Jack asked me." Kate replied before Sawyer could make a sarcastic answer "So…me and Sawyer are going to go now, you two know what to do?"

"You go dudes, we know what to do." Hurley started to walk over to the computer.

"Come on, Sawyer." She grabbed his arm and started to walk to the hatch door.

"Can you tell me why you're so desperate to get outta here?!" he pulled his arm out of her grip.

"Well Hurley said we could go…but if you want to stay-"

What?! Stay with mongo there and VH-1 has been, hell no!"

"Thought not." She grinned

There started walking back to the beach and there was a awkward silence.

"So… last night… I remember you… you kissed me, what was that for?" she asked him, not looking at him. He knew it was difficult for her to ask him.

"Nothin', you dared me, I did the dare, it meant nothin'." He knew he wasn't entirely telling the truth.

"Yeah." She didn't want to seem upset by his answer, that he didn't feel anything, but she was, because she felt something. Was it love? She didn't know, but she wasn't going to tell him.

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REVIEW please, that would make me a really happy! So the usual suggestions, favourite lines (if they were any, i don't think i had any good ones in this chapter...), maybe you can suggest some nicknames for other characters for Sawyer to name. I'll be bringing more characters soon as the story progresses. eg Jin, Sun,Claire etc


	4. Chapter 4 Help and Talks

**SassyLostie:** I put the Charlie/Hurley scene you requested! Sorry its just a short scene! Thanks for the amazing suggestions. Even if I don't put it in the next chapter I maybe put it in the future ones!

I would like to thank **xox-emily-xox, SassyLostie, bonboni, Basketball Babe8, ****kt2785** for the reviews. I really appreciate them! If you guys have any doubt where this story is going its definitely going to be Skate! Maybe some Jate to add more tension but Skate all the way.

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**Chapter Four - **Help and Talks

They parted when they arrived at the beach, Sawyer went back to his tent, Kate went to over to Claire who was playing with Aaron. Kate was walking to Claire's tent; Claire looked up and waved at her.

"Hey." Said Claire as Kate sat down next to her on her makeshift bed.

"Hi, so how's Aaron these days."

"He's been a bit fussy, the weather has been too how lately. But anyway how about you? What have you been up to?"

"Erm, I was on hatch duty last night. With Sawyer."

"Sawyer?" she looked confused "To be honest I thought you and Jack had a thing going on their…"

"Oh, no I don't mean that, _me_ and Sawyer are not together, and I did _not_ have a thing with Jack." She blushed

"If that what you say…"

"What does that mean?"

"Well…you quite an attractive girl, it seems that some men are quite attracted to you, to be exact _two_."

Kate looked at Claire confused "You mean Jack and Sawyer? Yeah I know Sawyer likes to flirt but Jack?!"

"Come on. You been close since day one!"

"He's my friend!"

"That's where the best relationships come from, first you start being friends, then you sorta become closer. And soon inseparable."

Sun started to approach Claire and Kate.

"Hey Kate, Claire." She nodded at both of them and turned to Kate "I was wondering if you could help me with me garden, I got some more seeds to plant."

"Yeah, sure." She stood up and turned to Claire "You want to come? You don't have to do anything, I guess you watch and talk."

"No, I'll be fine, now go." She shooed Kate away.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Sun and Kate were at the garden planting seeds. Sun looked up at Kate.

"So what was this about Jack and Sawyer?"

"Oh nothing, just Claire jumping to conclusions."

"Do you like them?"

"What? Jack and Sawyer?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Jack's my friend, so I like him as a _friend_. Sawyer…well he wouldn't call me a friend but I do like him equally as Jack."

"So... you don't have any strong feelings for any of them?"

Kate paused, thinking about her answer "No."

"So... you never kissed any of them?"

"Well, I sorta kissed both of them."

Sun was shocked she expected her to kiss one of them, but which one she didn't know.

"I kissed Sawyer first, but that was only to get Shannon's inhalers, you know during that time she had a asthma attack?" Sun nodded and Kate continued "And I kissed Jack during the time when Sawyer came back from the raft, I was confused, Sawyer came back half dead, I didn't know what I was doing, I thought I was going crazy."

"I understand." Kate looked at the ground.

"But that's not all, last night, I was in the hatch with Sawyer, we found some alcohol and... I got drunk and I kissed him."

"Did you want it to happen?" She was grateful Sun didn't judge her.

"At that time, yes. But I think it was the alcohol."

"Maybe in the future you shouldn't drink too much alcohol, I don't want him to take advantage of you."

Kate saw that Sun had a glimpse of worry on her face.

"I appreciated you care but I think I know how to handle him." She smiled at Sun.

"What did the kiss last night mean?"

"Last night was…" she didn't finish the sentence because she didn't know "I don't know, I don't really know…" she put her hands to her face "I'm in such a mess, Sun"

"It's ok." Sun gently put a hand on Kate's shoulder.

"You can always come to me if you have any problems, I'm always here to help."

"Thanks." They sat there in silence until Sun opened her mouth.

"I don't want to leave, but I said to Jin I would meet him for lunch."

"I'll stay here and plant some more."

"Will you be ok by yourself? I could get s-"

"I'll be fine."

"Well." Sun stood up, brush off the dirt on her "I'll be going then, bye."

Sun left Kate, planting the seeds all by herself. Kate's mind drifted back to the conversation she just had.

Since being on the island she has kissed two men, one of them twice. If she was in the 'real world' none of this would happen. But she isn't, she's here, on this island, lost. Being on the island has made her life so confusing. She never had feelings for both men at the same time, and honestly she didn't like. Kate stopped planting the seeds. She let out a big sigh, a tear started to slide down her face, soon she found herself crying. This was the second time she cried this week. She usually never let herself cry, because that meant she was weak and that was one of the things she didn't' want to be.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

"So…dude. I wonder what Kate and Sawyer was up to at the night shift." said Hurley reading the back of the record case.

"Er…pushing a button?" Charlie looked at Hurley with a quizzical look.

"Not that man. Don't you notice those two have something going on?"

"What? Kate and Sawyer?"

"Yeah."

"I wouldn't say they have something going on. Sawyer's a flirt, I bet he flirts with women all the time back at home. Anyway my moneys on Jack and Kate, they were close since day one."

"Nah, I think Sawyer and Kate will be together in the end."

"You wanna bet?"

"Yeah. I bet you $23,000 that Kate and Sawyer will become a couple, eventually."

"Ok, deal." They both shook hands.

"Oh yeah, and you can't encourage them. We just have to let nature take its course."

**BEEP**

"You going to take it?"

"Yeah." Hurley got up and started to walk up to the computer.

Xoxoxoxoxo

Sawyer was walking back from the waterfall that he and Kate found a couple of weeks ago. He took the bodies out a few days after they discovered it so he was happy to swim in it . he walked past Sun's garden but heard someone crying. He thought it was Sun.

"Hey what's wrong Tokyo Rose?" he walked through the long grass but it wasn't Sun but Kate, her eyes were all red and puffy.

"Oh, I thought you were Sun."

"Why ya cryin'." He walked towards her. Kate turned her back on him and wiped her eyes.

"It's nothing."

"You don't cry for 'nothing'."

"Gee, I don't know you care so much about me." her words seemed to hurt him.

"I don't." he said in defense.

"Well you can go then." She tried to blink back the tears but they kept coming back. Without saying anything Sawyer sat down next to Kate and pulled her towards him, letting her cry freely in his arms. They sat there, no words were said but they both felt comfortable.

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**So Hurley is a Skater and Charlie is a Jater… Review please! Sorry if this chapter is not as good as the other ones, i'm struggling for ideas.**


	5. Chapter 5 Love and Rage

**A/N: I'm really sorry this chapter was late! I had maths coursework to do and I just handed it in and now I got geography. The next chapter won't be up for awhile because I will be going to Vermont, skiing!(even though I NEVER skied in my life, but it should be fun and then I'm go to New York for some shopping! I never been to America so i'm looking forward to it). The first part of this chapter is a bit boring but I had to put it in to develop the chapter, and I also felt this chapter wasn't one of my greatest (well I had trouble of ideas at first but I got some now.)**

**Thanks for my reviews, keep them coming!!! I will bring in more characters….maybe even the Others. Oh I just remember and I'm asking you, the readers if you liked angst or fluffy skate, because I there is a lot of angst in this fic and I was wondering if you want it to continue or do you guys want fluffy cutesy skate?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Lost or Watership Down.

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**Chapter 5 –** Love and Rage

(2 Days later)

Sawyer was sitting on a plane chair outside his tent reading Watership Down for the third time, then Jin approached up to him.

"Hey, what's up Chewie?"

"You…fish…with me?" Jin looked at Sawyer hoping he understood him.

"Your English is getting' pretty good but why don't you the other people 'round here?" he gestured to the people around them.

"No…you." He pointed at Sawyer.

"Oh, alright then, seein' there is nothin' interestin' to do 'round here." Sawyer got up and threw his book on the sand floor and followed Jin .

xoxxoxxoxxox

After hours of fishing, Jin caught loads of fish, while Sawyer didn't catch any, which wasn't much help fir Jin. Sawyer decided to give up and started to pull the net out of the ocean and saw something caught in the net.

"Yipee, at last." Sawyer muttered sarcastically. He picked the object out of the net.

"Hey, I got meself an oyster!" he grinned at Jin. Jin gestured him to open it.

Kate was walking around the camp giving out fruit she had collected and stopped out Sawyer's tent, she paused wondering whether or not to look inside. She slowly pulled back the plastic sheet. Sawyer wasn't there. _Funny _she thought, she searched around the camp and saw Sawyer with Jin. They looked like they found something, but she stood where she was watching from afar.

"Ah, got ya!" he shouted when the oyster flipped open. There was a pearl inside.

"Wow…pretty...you…give Kate?" Sawyer looked at Jin as if he said something crazy.

"What?! Kate?" Jin nodded and walked towards his net full of fish and walked off towards his and Sun's tent.

Sawyer started back at the pearl in his hand. Maybe he should give it to Kate as pearls aren't exactly his king of thing.

He turned towards the camp and saw Kate standing there staring at him. He grinned at her and started walking towards her. Kate remained where she was standing and watched him coming towards her until he was just inches away from her.

"Admiring the view from afar, Freckles?" he smirked.

"No."

"I saw you. You were staring at me."

"I…was day dreaming." She tried to make some sort of excuse.

"Yeah…" he leaned towards her face "day dreamin'." He took her left hand. Kate jumped from the touch of his hands. She pulled her hand away from his and looked at the object that slipped into her hands. She opened her hands slowly to reveal a white shiny pearl, she gasped.

"Oh…wow, it's a pearl."

"Really? I thought it was a rock." He said sarcastically "I thought I would give it to ya as I have use for it and it can add to your collection of 'things to throw at Sawyer'." Kate laughed.

"Thanks." She said softly.

"What I didn't hear ya?" even though he did hear. She rolled her eyes knowing her heard her the first time.

"Thanks, Sawyer."

"No problem Freckles." He smiled and turned to walk away.

"Wait!" Sawyer stopped and slowly turned around.

"Would you like to walk with me, down to the beach?"

"Nah, it's not my thing."

She moved closer towards him "You know, you don't always have to be this tough man Sawyer all the time." She looked up at him.

"You really want me to walk with you? Why don't you just ask Jack? Bet he's into them kinda things."

"Who do you have to bring Jack into this?"

"Well you always look up to him like he's god or sumthin'. You always follow him around like a little lost puppy."

"No I _don't_ And since when-"

"The time when you followed us and got taken by them Others. You spent the whole journey back apologisin' to Saint Jack." She backed away from him, avoiding to look at him.

"Well he is a good man…unlike _you_."

"Was that suppose to hurt my feelings?"

"No it's the truth." She replied still not looking at him.

"Well I guess we said what needed sayin'." But he wasn't finished with Kate yet but decided to walked away before it got more complicated.

Kate was left on her own, when she thought they were finally getting on alright, they have another argument.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Sawyer stormed into his tent and sat on a plane seat. He rummaged through his suitcase and grabbed a can of beer; he opened the beer listening to the sound it made when you opened a can and threw the liquid down his throat as fast as he could. He didn't know why he was so angry. He felt like punching something. _Am I jealous of Jack? Why would I be? People constantly coming up to you with their problems, expecting you to make everything better. Why would I want that?_

Sawyer reached for another beer and then another and drank them all until he was drunk. He had this feeling deep down that he wanted to see Kate, wanted to tell Kate what he thought of her. He quickly got up and walked to what Kate called a 'tent', he personally though it was just rubbish and wouldn't stay up when it rains.

Kate had her own small camp fire set up and was staring at the fire on hand clutching onto a toy plane. She knew someone was approaching put didn't move to look who it was.

"Yo Freckles."

"What do you want?" she sounded annoyed.

"'Bout time me 'n you had a chat."

"About what?"

"'Bout _us_."

"There is no _us_."

"Well I think we have some sort of connection."

"That we both _murdered_ someone." She said in hushed tones.

"Apart from that, I'm getting' sick 'n tired of you messin' me around."

"What are you talking about?"

"You gotta choose, me or Jack."

"What?!"

"You need me to repeat that again?"

"I…I can't just choose."

"Why?"

"I just _can't_ ok?"

"Well I'm just sick of you messin' me around then when things don't go your way, you run back to Saint Jack-o. If you can't choose then why don't I make life easier for you. I'll leave this camp, live by myself, like that French chick, no strings attached." They stared at each other. "Well I guess this is goodbye, hope I don't see you again anytime soon." He turned his back and began to walk away.

"You don't know how much it hurts for me to be with you!" He turned around, facing her, startled by her tone of voice. "When you came back half-dead I said to myself I would never forgive myself if you died, because I never got to say goodbye." Her eyes were full of hurt and rage. You don't know how much it hurt when you said that the kiss we shared meant nothing to you…" she paused not sure whether to continue. "Because it did for_ me_." she pointed at her chest. "You don't know how much you made my life more difficult, just because, I…I love you."

"Kate." He said softly.

"Save it. You don't care. You don't even know anything about me." she took a huge breath, trying to calm herself down. She looked away from him. "I think it's best for us to stay away from each other, because all we ever do is argue."

He realised she was closing up on him again, but he didn't protest, he simply nodded and walked away. Most of the camp had heard the argument and everyone was staring at Sawyer walking back to his tent. He didn't say anything to them, not even a comment.

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**Review please! Fav line, suggestions ANYTHING!**


	6. Chapter 6 Gossip and Departure

**Ok i'm really sorry i haven't update for a LONG time. I have just come back from my skiing holiday and i'm back in one piece, but i did crash into a tree!!! I thought i would write a short chapter and update it now than put up a longer chapter and update a week later or so. This is a very short chapter but i promise the next would be longer! Thanks for the reviews!!! I really appreciate them!

* * *

**

Chapter 6 ­– Gossip and departure

Sawyer was lying on his makeshift bed, staring at the ceiling of his tent. He didn't expect anything like that to happen let alone Kate admitting her love for him. At that moment he decided not to wait for the morning to pack all his belongings, but now. _Nobody is gonna miss me _he thought _waiting til mornin' will make no difference._

xoxoxox

Kate woke up, he stomach was rumbling, _I better get something to eat_, she got up and walked over to the kitchen everyone helped made. She grabbed some mangoes from the basket and started to cut it up. Nearby Kate were a couple chatting, not aware Kate was there.

"Oh haven't you heard?"

"Heard what?"

"Sawyer."

"What about him?"

"It's always about you isn't it Nikki? Well if you wanted to know he's left camp."

Kate dropped her knife. _He's gone, it's all my fault_. She tried to listen to more of the conversation.

"He left camp last night, awhile after his argument with Kate. Couple of people saw him with a big rucksack walking into the jungle."

"Are you sure he's like, actually _left_? He could have just gone to find a place for all his stash."

"Before he left he said to a few who noticed him leaving that he was going to leave and live by himself. I wonder what made him do that?"

"Are you thick or what Paolo?! He had _obviously_ left because of Kate." She noticed Kate staring at her "Oh hi Kate, nice day isn't it?" _Please say that she didn't hear any of that_ she thought. Kate stared back at Nikki but couldn't handle what she just heard and ran away from the kitchen. "Look what you just done now Paolo!" she turned to Paolo.

"I didn't do anything!"

"If you didn't say any of this Sawyer stuff then none of this would have happened."

"Well sorrrrry, it's better for her to know now then later."

xoxoxox

With a heavy rucksack on his back, Sawyer managed to get as far away from the camp as possible, but still wanted to go further. He came across a clearing and decided to camp there for the day and rest before he continued his hike away from the camp. He sat down on a large rock and searched for his water bottle, he found it under all his shirts he could carry and unscrewed the bottle bringing it to his lips.

BANG BANG BANG!

"What the-"

A man in his late 20s with dark brown hair came out.

"Hello Sawyer." He pulled out a device from his back pocket and before Sawyer could move, let alone say anything, a dart went straight to his neck and he was out.

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**Please review!!!**


	7. Chapter 7 Others and Plans

**Hi thanks for the reviews! I might be able to go back to my routine of posting a chapter every tuesday, as my easter holidays is over and i have school. Well this chapter doesn't have much Skate in it but i will promise it will eventually in later chapters. Hope you like this chapter. Enjoy!** ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

**Chapter 7 –** Others and Plans

"Hey, wake up!" The man started to shake Sawyer.

Sawyer slowly opened his eyes. He looked around his surroundings. He was tied to a chair, he could see a desk with loads of files in front of him. The man slowly walked back behind the desk and sat on a big chair facing Sawyer.

"Who are you?!" he growled.

"Well, my name is Kona. Your people might refer to us as 'the others'."

"What do you want from me?"

"Well…I'm not going to tell you now, but you will find out in due course."

"If ya gonna kill me, then kill me now I got nothin' to live for on this island."

"Are you sure about that?" Kona dropped a thick file in front of him and Sawyer "We know a lot about you, more than you think. Ethan was a huge help to us, until one of your people killed him."

Sawyer didn't say anything he just stared back at the man.

"Well by tomorrow one of our people will visit your camp and give a message to your people, tell them that we have you and in exchange, we will have Kate and let you go. If they won't give us Kate we will kill you"

"If you touch her I'll-" Sawyer growled.

"You do what? I thought you don't care for anybody."

"You think I'm that stupid?! That I will believe you that-"

"Oh wait, I forgot the little detail in this whole exchange thing, when we have Kate we _won't _let you go. Seeing as she doesn't know, she would be willing to save your life."

"She wouldn't risk her life for mine, so your little plan won't work."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yeah." He lied, he didn't want to look defeated.

"I know you're lying Sawyer. I know she _loves_ you."

Sawyer stared at Kona confused.

"Ah, you didn't know? You thought Ethan was the only one of our people at your camp… you're wrong. We have about 4 people keeping an eye on you, on everyone."

"You're lying..."

"You sure about that?"

Sawyer didn't answer. He just looked down onto the floor.

"I thought so." Kona took a walkie talkie out of his back pocket and spoke through it "I think it's time to put Sawyer in his room now."

Sawyer looked up, wondering where they were going to take him now, and maybe if anyone was worried about him going missing. Then it hit him,how would they know? He left the camp to live by himself. They would just carry on as if nothing happen, that he was never on the plane, never existed…

Xoxoxox

Charlie was walking around the camp holding baby Aaron. He saw Kate sitting by herself eating a mango, he started to walk towards her.

"Hey."

"Oh, Hi, Charlie."

"Whats up?"

"Nothing."

"It's Sawyer isn't it?"

Kate looked at him, he knew he was right, they way she looked at him when he said his name.

"He'll be alright." He reassured her.

"How do you know? For all we know he could be...could be dead. Or he could have hurt himself with no one to help him." She whispered the last sentence feeling even more guilty. _What if she would never she him again? That her last words to him was to leave her alone, that he didn't know anything about her. He knew a lot more about her than anyone one this island._

"Kate, are you ok? You don't look so good."

Kate started to feel dizzy, but she ignored it. "I'm fine." She stood up, she saw the island spinning around her and then a sudden darkness…

"**Jack!** Someone get help over here!" Charlie shouted and kneeled down to Kate's body.

Jack ran upto them. "What happened?"

"I…we…she…she was…she fainted." Charlie stuttered the words out.

Jack moved his hand over Kate's forehead "She doesn't have a fever." He said "I think she might be dehydrated, being out in the sun for along time is not good for her." Jack scooped Kate up and took her to her tent, Charlie followed him.

"Do you want me to get some water?" Charlie asked.

"Yeah, please."

Charlie walked off towards the water trough.

Jack looked at Kate, she started to move. Her eyes flickered open, she was registering where she was and saw Jack staring back her.

"W-what happened?" she looked at Jack puzzled.

"You fainted, I think it's because you're dehydrated, have you eaten today?"

"No. I sort of skipped it…"

"That will explain it then."

Charlie came back without Aaron "I got some water and I left Aaron with Claire so I can help." he saw Kate looking at him "Oh you're awake! Are you ok?"

"Yeah I'm fine. It's just that I didn't eat anything today that all."

"You know Kate that wasn't a good idea to just 'skip' breakfast. It's not good for you, what if it happened in the jungle where no one is around. You don't know what's out there." Jack looked at her seriously.

"I won't do it again. _I promise_." She reassured him.

"Ok. Well you stay here and I'll get you some food."

"Ok."

"Well I guess I'm not need now, I'm glad you're ok Kate." Charlie started to walk away.

"Charlie!"

"Yeah?" he turned around.

"Thanks, you know, for getting help." She smiled.

"Glad to be of help." He smiled back at her and walked away.

Xoxoxoxo

"So you ready to go over to their camp, Kaleb?" asked Kona.

"Yeah." Said the young man. He was about 20 with short blonde hair.

"Ok, you know what to do don't you?"

"Yes, sir."

"But let's go over it again. Just to make sure it goes to plan."

"I go to their camp. I'll deliver the message, saying we got Ford, and that we will kill him unless they give us Austen, I will say that once we got Austen we will let Ford go. Then I'll tell them to meet me by sunset at the 'line', where they will tell me their decision. They will give me Austen and I will take her at the dummy camp for the first few days then bring her here."

"Good."

"But are they willing to give us Austen, just to save Ford?"

"_They_ aren't, but Kate will. She won't be able to live with herself with more blood on her hands... And you know you are only staying at the dummy camp for a few days just in case her people will follow you. If you see any of them at the dummy camp, capture them and take them with you on the way here. Alec and a few others will be at the dummy camp to help you."

"Ok, I think I know what to do."

"Here." Kona gives Kaleb a gun "Just in case."

"Thanks."

"Well I'll see you in 6 days."

Kona walked towards the door and went out of the room, leaving Kaleb in the room. He looks down at the gun in his hand and closes his hand over it, and shoves it in his back pocket. He leaves the room in silent ready to go the the survivors camp.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Review... PLEASEEEEEEEEEE! pretty please? 


	8. Chapter 8 Exchange and Ambush

**Hi guys thank you for the reviews!!! I'm really sorry for the late update, I don't think I will be able to update every Tuesdays like I did with the previous chapters. I have exams coming up (hopefully my writing skills has improved!), so I think the next chapter will be updated around late June, I know it is ages away but I will update ASAP as soon as my exams finishes. gives cookies and fishbiscuits to make up for the delay of the next chapter. Well enough of me talking… Enjoy!**

**Chapter Eight –** Exchange and Ambush

Sayid was the first one to be up and started to walk towards the kitchen, he glanced at the jungle and thought he saw something and shook his head._ I must be seeing things._ He looked up and that 'something' was still there, it was a person. He's been on the island for at least 2 months and recognises everyone in the camp, but this person, he didn't recognise at all. The person in the trees noticed Sayid looking at him and slowly walked towards Sayid with his hands up in the air.

"I mean no harm."

"Who are you?" asked Sayid.

"My name is Kaleb. I have come here to bring a message."

"You're one of them aren't you?" Kaleb saw the anger in Sayid face. Sayid tackled Kaleb to the ground and held his hands behind his back. "Jack!!" Sayid yelled.

Jack automatically woke up to the sound of his name and ran out of his tent. He saw Sayid holding a man hostage.

"Sayid, what are you doing?!"

"'He's one of them."

"How do you-"

"He just told me."

Everyone woke up from the commotion. In a few minutes everyone was around Sayid and the mysterious person.

"It's ok. We got it handled." Jack assured the group.

"Just let me give the message-" said Kaleb.

"What message?" Jack looked confused.

"I was told to give you a message. I was told that we have one of your people…"

"But everyone is here. No one is missing-"

"Are you sure about that, Jack?" Kaleb looked at Jack.

"How did you-"

"We know _everything_, Jack. Ok people, as you know we have one of your people, Sawyer." He glanced at Kate, who looked concerned. "If you want him back…you're gonna have to give us something in return."

"Maybe we don't want him back." Charlie yelled over the crowd.

"Well you won't mind if we just kill him then-"

"Wait! What do you want?" Kate stepped forward towards Kaleb with Sayid still holding him.

"Well…you."

"Me?!"

"Yes. In order to have Sawyer in one piece unharmed. We'll have you in return."

Kate didn't need to think whether or not to take up the proposition, the words slipped out of her mouth "Ok."

"What?! Kate, I don't think it's-" Jack didn't like this at all.

"Don't tell me what I can't do! It's my fault that he's in this mess."

"None of this is your fault." Jack walked towards Kate "I have a plan, seeing we have him hostage, we can trade him for Sawyer. We can go the 'line' we are not suppose to cross and we can compromise."

"Jack, I don't think these people are the kind to compromise."

"It will work. I promise."

"Ok."

"We will go with Sayid and Locke. And we _will_ get Sawyer back. Locke, Sayid, is that ok-"

"That's fine" said Locke.

Xoxoxoxo

"So you told Kaleb to give the message?"

"Yes….Ben." Kona was looking at the monitors in front of him, they had surveillance cameras all over the island. He was looking at one particular monitor which showed the 'line' where the survivors where not suppose to cross. "So, do you really think this is going to work out?"

"To be honest…no. But Kaleb doesn't know that." Ben spoke in a calm tone.

"What?! You don't think it's going to work? What if he gets killed?"

"Well I'm prepared for that if that will give us Austen."

"Why do you need _her_?"

"I will tell you when the time comes, but not now."

"Ok so you say the plan won't work out. Then Kona won't be at the line to meet them-"

"No he won't he would most likely to be captured by them. And they would probably take him to the 'line they are not suppose to cross'…" Ben looked at Kona, he looked confused.

"But how-"

"This is where you come in." Ben interrupted him and continued to talk "You and some others will be at _that_ line, but you will be hiding in the trees surrounding them. I think there will only be a couple of them bringing Kaleb to the line."

"But why would they bring back Kaleb back to-"

"An exchange. Kaleb for Sawyer… but we are not going to do that."

"Then what are we going to do?"

"You are going to capture them. The group bringing Kaleb, would most likely to be the strongest people in the group. You will shoot a dart in them like you did with Sawyer. And bring them back _here_. The group back at the camp won't even come for them because they are the weakest in the camp. Some may try, but they will fail. With limited amount of guns I doubt they would come for us asking for their friends back."

"When do I need to be there?"

"Well…now. I told the others about the plan. They will be ready when you're ready."

"Ok. I'll see you later."

"Bye."

Xoxoxoxo

Locke, Jack, Kate and Sayid were going oveer the plan Jack had.

"Ok so we are going to take him to the 'line' and demand for Sawyer back yeah?"

Everyone nodded. Sayid walked towards the nearest tree near them which had Kaleb tied to it. Jack and the others walked behind him.

"Come on." Sayid said in a low voice. Sayid untied the rope that had Kaleb tied to the tree. "Don't even think of escaping, we'll shoot you if you do." Sayid pulled Kaleb up and re-tied his hands again.

"Don't worry I won't escape. My people are more advanced than you think." replied Kaleb

"Shut up. And let's go." The group looked at Kate who had already started walking into the jungle.

"Kate! Wait up!" Jack yelled. Kate stopped and turned around "What's the rush?"

"We have to get Sawyer back. It's m-my fault. That's he with t-them." Kate started sobbing. Jack embraced Kate.

"It's not you fault."

"Yes it is."

"Even if it is, we are going to get Sawyer back ok?"

"Ok." She whispered, she quickly wiped her tears and looked at Locke and Sayid who was holding Kaleb.

"We're ready now?" Locke asked.

"Yeah let's go get Sawyer back." Jack said and they started their trek to the line.

Xoxoxoxo

"Right, Danny, you go over there with Colleen." Kona pointed towards some trees to the left of them. He had everyone surrounding the clearing and started to walk to the area he was to hide in.

Hours past and the sun was setting. Staring to fall asleep Kona was sudden awoken by talking and the trampling of undergrowth. He looked up and saw Jack, Kate, Locke and Sayid with Kaleb in the clearing.

"Here they are…" Kaleb muttered.

**Please review!!! puppy dog eyes I'll give you virtual milk and cookies! hands milk and cookies out**


	9. PLEASE READ

**Ok I'm starting to run out of ideas. And this may sound bad but I have no idea where any of this is going!! I'm just going with the flow. So between now and late June, if any of you have any suggestions please tell! Because I may have to end this fic after a few chapters, if nothing pops into my head anytime soon. Maybe having a short break will sort brain out and I may change my mind in June. **

**I just want to say you guys have been the best and thank you for reviewing! Christina x**


	10. Chapter 9

**Hi guys!!! I wasn't going to update until next month because of my exams and stuff but I managed to have a few hours spare and I wrote a chapter. I have been thinking about for a few weeks and I thought that maybe I should change the title of the fic? I don't think it suits the fic very much now. But I don't have any ideas to change it to so yeah…. Then I thought I should ask you guys if I should change it of not and if so what would you want it to be called instead? Anyway… I think this fic may soon end it I don't have any ideas, so suggestions are much needed!!! Next chapter won't be up until next month unless I have spare time. Before I forget thank you so much ****Bonboni**** for the advice!!! Enjoy!**

**Chapter 9 **

"What? What did you say?" Sayid asked Kaleb.

"I did not say anything." Kaleb replied.

Before Sayid could answer him back he felt a dart injected into his neck and started convulsing.

"Say-" before Jack could say anymore he felt something injected into him, he tried to fight against it but he blacked out. Darts were shot at Locke and Kate, they looked around the jungle started spinning then darkness overtook them.

"Right, I think they are asleep. You can come out!" Kona shouted, he ran towards Kaleb who just stood there staring at his captors on the ground. Kona walked towards Kaleb and untied him.

"Thanks."

"Hope they haven't been treating you badly."

"Not really."

Danny and the others began coming towards them.

"'I'm just going to radio Ben." Kona told the group and moved the walkie talkie towards his face "Ben? Are you there?"

"Yes. Have you got them?" Ben's voice echoed around the jungle.

"Yes I got them."

"Well there has been a change of plan."

"What? You said-"

"Like I said there has been a change of plan, and you better listen…"

"Yes, Ben."

"Ok you take Kate. And _only_ Kate. Leave Sheppard, Locke and Jarrah. They'll wake up when it wears off."

"So you want me to just take Kate?" asked Kona, sounding confused.

"Yes. And hurry before the drug wears off."

"Will do."

Kona motioned the group to get Kate. They picked up the Kate's limp body and together they walked back to their camp, confused by Ben's requests.

Xoxoxox

Kate opened her eyes. Her vision was still blurred, shaking her head her vision started to come back. She looked around the room she was in and saw a figure at the far corner on the ground. Her stomach turned, she realised it was Sawyer. Kate ran towards Sawyer.

"Sawyer! Can you hear me?" she shook her gently. He had cuts all over his face but they were healing and his clothes were all covered with dried blood.

"Wha-"

"Sawyer you're alive!" she said, relieved that he was ok.

"What the hell are you doin' here? I thought you told me to leave you alone?"

Kate looked away, obviously hurt by his words. _I deserve it, I hurt him, and now he's doing it to me_.

"They took me. I dunno how. All I remember is that shot a dart into me…"

"You didn't sacrifice yourself for me did ya? Coz that's just-"

"How did you know about that?"

"They told me sumfin' bout having an exchange. Me for you."

"Yeah they told us that. Jack wouldn't let me hand myself in."

"Well ain't that nice of him." He muttered.

"He was trying to protect me!" she retorted

"Well you know what? I'm not gonna listen to anymore of you defending Saint Jack-o. You stay on your side of the room and I'll stay on mine. And things may just go along peachy!" he replied angrily.

"Fine!" she tried to disguise the sadness she felt. She walked over to her side of the room.

Hours past and none of them said a word to each other. Every few minutes Kate would look at Sawyer at the corner of her eyes. She wondered what they did to him during them days he was taken. She was worried. Not just for herself, but for them.

"Will you quit staring at me?" his voice echoed

"I was-" before she could finish her sentence the steel door opened. Ben walked into the room followed by a guard.

"Hello James, Kate." Ben nodded at Kate. She didn't respond. Ben turned towards the guard "You can go now, I can handle this." The guard nodded and walked down towards the corridor.

"What do you want with us?" Kate demanded.

"I'm sorry, but I can't tell you that." Ben replied.

"Don't you think we have the privilege to know that you're going to kill us?"

Ben laughed, his laugh disturbed Kate "Kate, you think that we are going to kill you?"

"Yes." She replied. Sawyer was watching the exchange of words between Kate and Ben; he was trying to figure out a way of escape. But the only plan he got was that he would tackle Ben and hold him down while Kate escape. He would have to face with the punishment they would give him for helping Kate escape. But if it meant Kate would be safe and unharmed, he was willing to do it. Sawyer launched at Ben, slamming him to the floor.

"Sawyer! What are you doing?!" she asked.

"Go! I got him. Run while you can." He answered.

"No." she protested

"This is not the time to disagree with me, Freckles. Go _now_."

"No."

Sawyer was about to say something but he was pulled off Ben. He was punched and kicked in the stomach by the guard.

"Please stop!" Kate shouted. Ben got up and brushed his clothes, he looked at Sawyer being beaten up continuously.

"That's enough now. I think he got the message." said Ben. He looked at Kate "Someone will bring you dinner. You better not do anything stupid when it comes." Ben quietly walked out of the room with the guard closely behind him. Kate walked towards Sawyer. He had blood coming from his mouth and his old cuts had opened up again.

"Sawyer? Are you ok?" she touched his face, he moved his face away from her hand.

"What do you think?" the anger in his voice scared her "I told you to run."

"I didn't want to leave you."

"It's everyman for himself, Freckles."

"No it isn't! I'm not just going to leave you with them." She pointed at the door.

"Why huh?" he asked.

"Because Sawyer, I care about you." She whispered "No matter how much I want to stop. I can't." she looked at Sawyer, waiting for his reply.

"You want me to say the same thing bout you? No point in declaring your love for me, sweetheart. You will end up being hurt." He looked at Kate saddened face. His words affected her more than he expected. _ Yeah, hurt her real bad and she'll leave you and never look back. That's what I'm best at anyway._ Kate got up and walked to her side of the room, she sat in the corner, facing away from Sawyer. He pulled himself towards the wall and propped himself to the wall. His wounds were stinging him but he wasn't complaining. The room was quiet, all they could hear were their breaths. Sawyer looked at Kate. She was curled up into a ball; he could see her shaking and her hands coming up to her face, every couple of minutes. _She must be crying_ he though. He got up and moved up to Kate.

"Kate." He spoke softly.

"Go away! Since when do you care?" she snapped.

"Ok, if that's how you want it." He replied back angrily and walked back to his corner.

Kate continued to cry. _How come my life is never easy?_ It pained Sawyer to see Kate upset, all he wanted to do was to go and comfort her, tell her he loved her too and that they were going to be ok. But he wasn't James, he was Sawyer and Sawyer doesn't do love, it made him weak and vunerable.

**Please review!! Suggestions as well!!! I'm trying to beat my record of 6 reviews but I'll doubt that will happen. I'm just happy that people enjoy this fic so I give you cookies!! Anyway I haven't seen the finale yet and stayed spoiler free for the finale so I can't wait to watch it tomorrow!!!**


	11. Chapter 10

**Thanks **to **xox-emily-xox****bonboni****sivan**** and ****speckled girl**** for the reviews****!!! I never thought that I would be able to write another chapter until after my exams, but hey I have! Well I just watched the finale a few days ago and O-M-G! is all I can say!!!! R.I.P Charlie I'll miss you!!! I will say no more incase any of you haven't seen.**

**Back onto topic I think Jack in this chapter is a bit OTT but hey it was fun writing it. I don't think there will be another chapter until late June but like Lost, anything can happen and I may have time to write a new chapter. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 10**

Days had passed and no sign of rescue had come. Kate and Sawyer hardly exchanged words since their last talk, just a 'good morning' when they woke up and a 'goodnight' when they went to sleep, no words in between. Kate couldn't stand the silence between them and finally spoke.

"I have a plan."

"Yeah, course you do." He replied not believing her.

"Well if you just listen to me, we may have a chance to get out of here."

Sawyer sighed "Ok, what is this _amazin_' plan?"

"These past few days I've been watching them, that guy brings the food in and leave, I'm pretty sure he comes here alone as they think you won't do anything stupid since what happen last time. He also carries a tazer and gun in his back pocket. Next time he comes in we knock him out and take his gun and tazer. We can shock anyone that gets into our way, that will give us a few minutes to escape. We only use the gun at the last resort...So what do you think?" She looked at Sawyer waiting for his response.

"I must say, that is a very good plan, would never think you could think of something like that." He smirked.

Kate smiled "Was that a compliment or insult?" Sawyer opened his mouth to say something back but the steel handle started to turn open, he forgot what he was about to say and ran near the door, ready to knock the guy out. The door opened and a young woman came in. Sawyer looked at Kate wondering whether to knock her out or not, the look Kate gave him told him not to do it. The young woman saw Sawyer behind her.

"I'm not here to hurt you." She looked at them both.

"What are you here for then?" Sawyer asked.

"I'm here to help you escape."

"What?!" Kate looked at the young woman bewildered.

"No time to explain, but if you want to leave here and get back to your camp you have to leave _now_."

"How do we know that all this ain't a trap?" Sawyer asked not believing anything that was coming from the woman's mouth.

"Look, I'm here to help you. You either want it or not." She stared at Sawyer.

"Come on, this is our chance." Kate grabbed Sawyer's arm and pulled him with her.

Sawyer pulled her grip off him "Are you crazy?! You actually believe her?"

"Sawyer, look at her, she is only young. I doubt she will kill us."

"I swear to God Freckles that if-"

"We'll get to it if that happens." Kate looked up at Sawyer "Please, just believe me." She squeezed his arm.

"Ok. Let's go." He muttered. They both looked at the young woman.

"The coast's clear. I'm pretty sure there is only a couple of people in this hatch. They won't be very alert." She rummaged into her bag and drew out two guns "Here." She handed the two guns to Kate and Sawyer "Just in case."

"Thanks." Kate whispered. "You know. I don't even know your name or who you are."

"Name's Alex. I'm the boss's daughter. Enough talk if you want to actually escape."

"The boss's daughter huh? I never saw that comin'" he mumbled.

They followed Alex along the corridor. Kate stayed close to Sawyer, his close presence made her feel safe.

Xoxoxox

_Few days ago _

Jack woke up his head was throbbing with pain. "Urgh." He moaned.

"Jack." Jack looked up at the Iraqi man.

"You ok?"

"Yeah, I'll survive. What happened? Kate?"

"She's been taken, they took the guns too." Locke's voice shocked Jack.

"What do you-? How? Did she hand herself in?" his mind was all over the place.

"I don't know Jack, we know as much as you." Locke replied.

"Sawyer? Did they release him?" Jack asked puzzled to why he was on the jungle floor.

"Not that I know off."

"Can you find their tracks?" Jack got up.

"I looked around the perimeter and the only tracks I found were ours."

"There must be something."

"Jack, maybe we should go back to the beach. Get some rest, think of a another plan. These people are more clever than we thought." Sayid spoke up.

"They got them! Kate….Sawyer. They got our people!" Jack yelled, aiming his hand at the jungle.

"Jack, you're not thinking right. You need some rest, we can't have our only doctor on a suicide mission with no guns." said Locke.

"You're right. But I'm going out to find them tomorrow. And no one is going to stop me." demanded Jack.

"That's fine by me." answered Locke and started to hike back to the camp followed by Sayid. Jack looked at the trees ahead of him.

"I'll be back." He whispered and slowly followed Locke and Sayid.

xoxoxox

"So what's the plan?" Sawyer asked the obvious question.

"I help you escape, as easy as that." Said Alex.

"So no but's or if's?" he quizzed her.

"Look, can you just believe her Sawyer?" Kate stared at Sawyer "Just because you don't do things out of kindness doesn't mean everyone else has to." Sawyer looked away from Kate, she could tell her words affected him and regretted saying it.

"Come on. The jungle is just out of this door…" Alex paused "Once we are out of this hatch, you have to do it alone. If they see me with you it'll blow my cover, I'll be in a lot of trouble. I will have to alert them that you have escape to make it less suspicious, I can tell them you went in a different direction but it won't prevent from catching up with you, so you have to hurry. You have to go to the shoreline, go along it and you will find a canoe covered in palm leaves-"

"Wait. Why do we have to-" Kate asked

"You're on a different island. Your island is just next to it. Paddle to your island and you will back at your camp by sunrise." Alex answered back.

"Hey, how come we didn't see this island before?"

"You're on the other side. So you'll have to paddle around the island as well."

"Joy!" Sawyer said sarcastically.

Alex looked at Sawyer and Kate "So you ready?"

"Yeah." Sawyer responded.

"I'm going to give you 10minutes head start."

"10minutes?!"

"Sawyer." Kate glared at him and turned to Alex "That's enough, thank you Alex, you know for helping us escape."

"It's ok, anything to annoy my dad."

Kate smiled at Alex and walked out of the door. She felt relieved when she stepped into the jungle surroundings, she never knew she would miss it so much until she was confined into the small room they held her in. Sawyer walked beside her, his arm nearly touching hers.

"Let's go." Together they ran off deep into the jungle never turning back.

**PLEASE REVIEW!!!!! Suggestions as well! I'll give virtual cookies for those who review!!!!**


	12. Chapter 11

**Hello! Sorry for the LOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG wait. I haven't forgotten about this fic yet!!! My internet isn't working and I have been waiting for about 2 months now for it to come back on and I'm and I managed to update this fic at my grandad's house because I'm doing 'homework' cough. Sorry this is a short fic but I can promise the next chapter is my longest yet… I think. Hopefully I would update more often if my internet comes back on soon. I would also like to say thanks to my reviewers, because you help me carry on with this fic. Review and enjoy!**

**Chapter 11**

"Kona, Kona!!!" Alex yelled, out of breath from the running "They've…they've escape. Ford and Austen. I don't know how, I went to check in on them and….they're gone."

Kona looked up at Alex "What?! How?"

"I..I don't know."

"I want you to tell the others and I want them to look for them, they can't be far. Being on a different island makes it more harder for them to escape."

Alex quickly nodded and turned to exit.

"And Alex?" Alex paused and slowly turned around.

"Don't tell Ben about this, I don't want him to know that they've escaped."

"Of course." She turned to leave and walked towards the room where they kept the monitors. She looked up at one of the screens and could see Kate and Sawyer running away, they already near the beach. Removing all the evidence on how they escaped, she ejected the surveillance tape and took it out of the machine and pulled the film out of it, destroying it. She quickly shoved the videotape remains in her bag and walked out the room. Her hand went into her bag for the second time and she pulled out a walkie talkie. "Kaleb? Are you there?"

xoxoxox

Sawyer and Kate finally reached the beach and were frantically looking for the canoe. They didn't see the Kaleb sneaking up behind them with his gun aiming at them.

"Kaleb? Are you there?" Alex's voice echoed from the walkie talkie Kaleb had with him.

Sawyer and Kate swiftly turned around alarmed by the voice.

"Why hello there." Said Kaleb, his gun still aiming at them. "Why don't you stop looking for whatever you're looking for?"

"No." Sawyer reached behind his back and rapidly pulled out his gun and shot Kaleb in the leg. Kaleb fell to his knees and Sawyer took that moment to run and grabbed Kate with him running along the beach.

"Sawyer, I see it! I see the boat!" Kate shouted and pulled away from Sawyer's grasp and ran towards the canoe. Kate pulled the palm leaves away and started to shove the canoe into the water with Sawyer's help.

A gunshot was heard. Sawyer looked up and saw Kaleb limping towards them. He turned towards Kate and her body was on the ground, blood was coming from her right thigh. Sawyer whipped his gun from his back pocket and shot Kaleb without any hesitation. This time the bullet hit right into Kaleb's upper body and he fell to the ground, presumably dead.

"That's for shootin' Kate." He said in a low angry voice. He slowly turned his back on it and saw Kate's limb body. He hurried up to her, "Kate, Freckles? Come on baby, can you hear me?"

Kate eyes flickered open "Sawyer." She hoarsely whispered.

"Stay with me. Kate, you have to stay with me ok? You are going to be ok. We're going home and Jack will fix you up all nicely and you'll be climbing trees in no time." Kate smiled at his last words. Gently Sawyer lifted Kate into his arms and softly placed her into the canoe, making sure he didn't hurt her when he placed her in the canoe.

Sawyer pushed the canoe towards the sea and jumped into the canoe and quickly grabbed onto an oar and started to paddle away from the island towards theirs.

"Kate. I need you to talk to me. I need you to be awake, can you do that?."

"Ok." She whispered.

"Good.Well why don't we talk about our likes and dislikes. Think of it as a way to get to know each other."

"I hate the Others."

"I for one agree with you there. Once we got you fixed, we're gonna get our revenge." He muttered, he paused thinking for a moment. "I like reading." He said trying to change the topic.

"Like I didn't already know that." She paused, she was breathing heavily. "And right now I hate my leg." She said softly. Sawyer looked down at Kate's bullet wound, it was bad, more blood was coming out. "It's bad isn't it?" Kate's voice startled Sawyer. She tried to sit up but was too weak.

"No, not at all." He lied "I'm just going to use my shirt to stop the bleeding ok?" Kate nodded and Sawyer took of his shirt and carefully wrapped it around Kate's thigh, he realised she was losing a lot of blood and with no hospitals around…he didn't even want to think about it, he would get to it if they go there. "We're not far away now, we're near our island and I'll just need to go around it to get to our camp. Just hold on ok?"

"Yeah."

Sawyer carried on paddling towards their island. Now he was paddling as much force as he could. He needed to get Kate examined at, he was no doctor. For once since he crashed on the island he was thankful that Jack was on the island. He wouldn't know what to do if Jack wasn't there.

Two hours later Sawyer managed steer around the island and was nearly at the beach. He didn't hear much from Kate because he was so concentrated on getting her help. He looked down at Kate._ Damn, I was suppose to keep her awake_. She appeared to be sleeping.

"Freckles." He whispered, Kate didn't move. "Freckles, come on wake up." Still no answer. "Kate, come on wake up for me. Kate." He sounded more urgent and shook her, and their was still no response. "Kate! Now's not the time to be sleeping. You gotta wake up. Don't make me throw a banana at you." He joked hoping it will wake Kate up from her deep sleep. Sawyer stopped paddling and dropped the oar beside him. He slowly brought his hand to Kate hand. "Please, no." he whispered with much sadness. He tried to feel a pulse. He couldn't find one. He felt for her neck and he couldn't find one there either. "Kate! Please, don't leave me. You gotta fight." He cried with much desperation "I'll do anything, just say something, _anything_. Please. Kate, don't leave me. I-I love you. Just say something." He brought her up to him and pulled Kate towards him, embracing her. For the first time since his parents died, he cried. He cried because he was losing someone he loved all over again.

**How was it? Writing this chapter was very hard for me and I didn't think it was that good. Well review please!!!!! You can say how much you hated it or how much you loved it. Or BOTH!!! The more reviews I get the quicker the update!!! PLEASE REVIEW!!!**


	13. Chapter 12

**Hi! Thank for the reviews!!! I sort of got not so good news. I'm thinking of not carrying on with this fic, but I wrote this ages ago so I thought I would put this up. So this maybe the last update because I have NO IDEA on how to carry on with this fic. I sort of have half of chapter 13 written so I may just update it just after this chapter and then that's it I think unless if any of you guys have any suggestions? Please review and enjoy!**

**Chapter 12**

"Sawyer." She mumbled through his shirt, it was just loud enough for him to hear.

"Kate?" he pulled her away from him astonished.

"Who else?" She just managed to utter the words, her eyes still closed.

"I…I thought you were…I. It doesn't matter now." He stuttered.

"Are we home?" she murmured.

"Not yet. Nearly." He added.

"Good."

"Stay awake, yeah?" he quickly wiped his eyes hoping Kate wouldn't see before she open her eyes. She slowly opened her eyes, her vision focusing on Sawyer. She cold see his eyes were all red.

"Were you crying?"

"No, just tired. Unlike some people I didn't get to sleep." He teased, he was thankful Kate was alive and felt like yelling of joy. He reached the oar and began paddling again.

"So. What shall we talk about?" Kate asked.

"I dunno. Maybe you can tell me bout your married life you mentioned not long ago." He waited for a reply hoping she would answer him.

"It was during when I was on the run." She finally replied.

"How the hell did you fit that when you were on the run?!"

"It was complicated." He could tell by her voice that she was in pain.

"Sure it was." He tried to put her mind off her wound.

"I had an alias."

"Bet that made it so much easier."

"It did actually."

"Course it would."

"Can we just change the subject?" she didn't want the subject to get anymore difficult.

Sawyer looked up at Kate and could see her pained face of talking about her past. "Yeah, sure. Just 10 more minutes and in no time the Doc would have fixed you all up." He smiled at her hoping that what he said was true and Jack would be able to fix her.

They finally got to the beach and the camp had seen them coming to the shore and gathered waiting for them to arrive. Jack ran from his tent and saw it was Kate and Sawyer. Sawyer could tell by Jack's reaction that he was relieved for Kate to be back. What he didn't know was that she was injured. When Sawyer looked back down at Kate and saw she was unconscious again.

"Kate." Jack said when Sawyer pulled the canoe onto the beach. He saw the state of Kate and her bloody leg. He gave an icy stare at Sawyer "What the hell did you do to her?"

"I did nothin'!" Sawyer retorted

Jack ignored him and carried Kate out of the canoe and ran to her tent to tend to her.

"What happened really?" Sayid came up from behind Sawyer.

"We escaped and Kate got shot it the process." Sawyer turned around and say Sayid's unconvincing face. "You want the long story then fine. This girl…Alex, she helped us escape and told us we were on a different island from the one we're on now, and we had to escape on a canoe. One of 'them' must have saw us when we were lookin' for the canoe and shot Kate. Then we escaped."

"What like he just let you go after shooting Kate?"

"No I shot him." He muttered. "So you believe me or Jack?"

"I believe you." He replied in his thick accent.

"But the Hero doesn't."

"Since when do you need Jack's approval?"

"I don't."

"Well I guess every things sort then."

"No it isn't. One of _them_ shot Kate!"

"Apart from that."

"So what are we gonna do?"

"We'll talk about that when Kate gets better."

Xoxoxoxox

"Kate? Can you hear me?" asked Jack.

"Sawyer." She faintly muttered, her eyes still closed.

"No, it's Jack."

"Oh." He could tell the disappointment in her voice but before he could say anymore she went back to unconsciousness. Jack sighed and placed a cold flannel on her forehead and began removing the bullet that was lodged into Kate's thigh. Half an hour later and with the help of Sun, the removal of the bullet was successful and luckily the bullet didn't hit anything important. Jack stitched Kate up and sat by her side, waiting for her to wake up.

Kate finally opened her eyes and looked around her surroundings. She was surprised to find Jack watching over her.

"Hey." He whispered. "How are you?"

"I'm ok I guess, a bit sore." She replied.

"What happened out there?"

"I was shot. By one of them."

"What about Sawyer?"

"Sawyer?" she looked at Jack bewildered. "Wasn't he on the canoe with me?"

"Yeah. But what did he do to you?"

"He did nothing Jack."

"Then how did you get-"

"Like I said, one of them shot me. Sawyer did nothing."

"Ok."

"Is it ok if I had some time alone?"

"Yeah sure. I'll come later to check on your wound." He said in disappointment. He felt like an idiot thinking Sawyer could have had something to do with Kate being shot. Now Kate is annoyed with him for blaming Sawyer.

Sawyer went into Kate's tent just after Jack left. He made sure that no one saw him come in. Kate smiled went she saw him and gestured him to sit next to her. He did what she told him to do and smiled showing off his dimples.

"Hey, you ok?" he said. He hoped Kate didn't hear what he said on the canoe, he wouldn't know how to handle it if she asked him, not now.

"Could be better. But I'm fine."

"I would have been here earlier but Ja-"

"Jack? What did he have-"

"He wouldn't let me come here and see you. Thinks I got somethin' to do with that." he pointed at Kate's bandaged leg.

"But you would never hurt me…"

"Yeah but Jacko doesn't think that."

"Let's not talk about Jack…So how are you?"

"Just dandy! Just found out everyone has bin lookin' 'round in my stash and took some as their own." Kate smiled, she liked it when Sawyer was back to his old self.

"You'll get it back." She reassured him.

"Doubt it. I asked some of them for it back and they said no. Shows how much they really missed us when we were gone." He paused and looked at Kate. "So you remember anythin' that happened on the canoe?"

"No, not much. Just bits and pieces. Why? I didn't say anything embarrassing did i?"

Sawyer took this moment to fool her "Well…" he said slowly, "I dunno if it was that embarassin'-"

"Sawyer! Tell me." She urged him.

"You sorta proposed to me. And I said yes. Then you started to kiss me and suggested to make hot love in the canoe. Of course, you weren't thinkin' right and being a _gentleman_. I refused, but then you looked at me with them goddamn puppy dog eyes of yours and then one thing led to another…" he sprung out the tale of lies like it actually happened.

"Oh god. Please say I didn't say or _do_ any of that." She brought her hand to her face.

"You sure did." He grinned. "You looked like you enjoyed it as well." He added.

"So are we…?" she looked at him trying to read his mind but at that second it was impossible.

Sawyer looked at Kate back. They continued to stare at each other until Sawyer looked away and smirked.

"What are you smiling about?" she asked, puzzled to the way Sawyer was reacting. "I mean what is going to happen between us? Are we going to act as if nothing happen or-"

"None of it happened."

"So we are going to act like none of-"

"Like I said none of it _happened_." He confirmed.

"Oh." She said it like she was disappointed. Sawyer turned to stare at her. "I didn't mean it to sound so-"she quickly added but he interrupted her.

"I get ya."

The tent was silent and none of them moved in their places.

"That wasn't a nice prank to pull, you know." She said to break off the silence.

"But you were gullible enough to believe me though."

"I guess."

"You know I remember one thing that happened on the canoe." Sawyer held his breath, hoping she didn't hear him saying that he loved her and how he didn't want her to leave him. "It's sort of blurry but I remember that you said you didn't want me to leave you…and that you loved me." She looked at Sawyer but he looked away from her trying to focus on something else. She waited for his response but it never came.

She knew that the whole situation was making him uncomfortable but she knew she had to ask him. If she didn't she might regret it.

"Sawyer…" she whispered. "What you said, did you mean it?"

**REVIEWS & SUGGESTIONS ARE WELCOME!!**


	14. Chapter 13

**Woa! It has been a long time since I updated! I'm very sorry! gives basketfuls of cookies to everyone I'm also sorry that this is a VERY short chapter and I don't know what to do after this chapter so I need ALOT of suggestions or maybe you thoughts on what you want to happen next! I would also like to thank ****SassyLostie****Jerseygirl92****Mathildou****ape975****bonboni****Basketball Babe8**** and of course ****sivan8****, who if I wasn't for her/him this fic probably wouldn't have an update! I just hope people are still interested in this fic, but I don't blame you if you don't because it sort of not very good anymore because I don't know what to write! **

**Chapter 13**

"Sawyer? What you said-"

"Yeah." He whispered.

"Oh…" Kate looked away trying to register what he just admitted.

They didn't know that those three words could complicate their relationship so much. It meant vulnerability, trust, and worst of all commitment. A normal couple would deal with it, learn from their mistakes. But this was Kate and Sawyer. Love makes them feel exposed, like a tortoise without its shell.

"I'm gonna go." He muttered, as he stood up and turned to look at Kate. "Funny how you don't know what to say. Cuz not long ago you said the same words to me. Guess we weren't meant to be. It was stupid enough to think that it could _happen_, let alone _work_." He said, mixed with hurt and anger.

Kate nodded she felt his gaze on her, but refused to look at him back. Sawyer turned his back on Kate and slowly walked out of the tent. Kate could feel the tension in the air that they left things on bad terms and all she wanted to do was to tell him she loved him back. She said those words before, why couldn't she say it now? But this time she knew he felt the same way back. Saying those words just made matters worse.

xoxoxox

Kate opened her eyes, she was still in her tent. She saw Sun overlooking her.

"Hey." Kate whispered.

"Hi Kate. Do you feel any better now?" asked a worried Sun.

"Yeah. I feel great." But mentally she wasn't. She needed to see Sawyer, explain why she acted like she did when they last talked.

"But?"

"But what Sun?" asked a puzzled Kate.

"I haven't known you for long Kate. But I know when something is wrong. And I want to help you." Sun smiled softly.

"I don't think you can, Sun."

"I could try." Sun offered.

"You can't. He resents me."

"Who?"

"Who else can hate me on this island?"

"I don't-"

"Sawyer, ok?"

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"I don't think he resents you."

"Yes he does. You weren't there when it happened. I messed up Sun." A single tear was falling down Kate face.

"What happened?" Sun reached for Kate hand and placed hers on top. "You can tell me."

Kate slowly sat up on her makeshift bed with the help of Sun.

"It started ok at first. We were joking around and stuff. He told me that on the canoe that I proposed to him…" Sun appeared shocked but Kate reassured her "He was joking of course. Then I said I remember on the canoe that he said he doesn't want me to leave him and…" Kate took a deep breath, "He loves me."

Sun smiled at Kate, "Now tell me Kate, why on earth would Sawyer hate you, if he loves you?"

"He's Sawyer." Kate smiled softly "He's unique."

"True. There is no man like him."

"But he's a such complex guy." Repeating first words he said to her after the crash.

"But you can learn from your mistakes. Deal with them."

"You are saying it like me and Sawyer are a couple."

"You will be." Sun said it with much confidence.

"I'm not so sure about that."

"What are you so afraid of Kate?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's like… you are avoiding to be with Sawyer."

"I'm not, it's just that…" Kate didn't know what to say, what should she say? She didn't know.

"I was going to leave Jin before we crashed." Sun admitted, "But I didn't, because I love him. I'm sure that if I did I would have regretted it until the day I die. Don't leave things until it's too late Kate." Sun pulled Kate for a hug and slowly walked away towards Jin down by the beach leaving Kate to think things over.

**Please review!!! Suggestions as well because I REALLY need it!**


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